Un poco de humor marrón...

(Hay peores cosas en los "reality shows...")

Esta es la copia de un "Memo Interno" escrito por el gerente general de una compañía multinacional de capitales americanos, en reacción a la cultura existente dentro de su filial latinoamericana.

Asunto:MEMO INTERNO


FROM: GENERAL MANAGER
TO: ALL SPANISH SPEAKING STAFF
SUBJECT: IMPROPER LANGUAGE USAGE

It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our establishment in Buenos Aires, that our Spanish speaking staff commonly usus offensive language.
Such behavior in addition to violating our policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and staff. All personnel will immediately adhere to the following rules:

1.- Words like "carajo", "la puta madre que te parió" or "me da por el quinto forro de las pelotas" and other such expressions, will not be tolerated or used for emphasis or dramatic effect, no matter how heated a discussion may become.

2.- You will not say "la cagó" when someone makes a mistake, or "la está cagando" if you see somebody being reprimanted, or "que cagada" when a major mistake has been made. All forms and derivations of the verb "cagar" are utterly inappropriate and unacceptable in our environment.

3.- No project manager, section head or administrator under any circumstances, will be referred to as "hijo de mil putas", "guanaco", "mal parido", "es una mierda" or "es una bosta".

4.- Lack of determination will not be referred to as "falta de huevos", nor will persons who lack initiative be referred to as "cagón de mierda", "pelotudo", "maricon" or "boludo"

5.- Unusual or creative ideas offered by the management are not to be refered to as "pajas mentales", "boludeces" or "forradas".

6.- Do not say "como hincha las pelotas" if a person is persistent, "cago la fruta" if a colleague is going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, you must no say "cagamos" (please refer to item # 2) when a mater become excessively complicated.

7.- When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say "andate al carajo", nor should you ever substitute "May I help you?" with "que mierda querés?".

8.- Under no circusnstances should you ever call our elderly industrial partners "viejos chotos".

9.- Last but by no means least, after reading this note please don't say "me limpio el culo con ella". Just keep it clean and dispose of it properly.


Thank you.
Regards, PPP.

 

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